• October 27, 2020
• 3 comments

Thank you, Devorah Baron, for this question. Devorah asked this in response to “Noach: The Best Parents”. Even though all 3 of Noach’s children were worthy of being saved from the flood, one of them was Cham who didn’t turn out to be so great. So were Noach and Naama great parents or not? And how do we, as parents, define success for ourselves? Thank you so much Devorah! Your question is so important and I can’t wait to hear everyone’s answers. The way I try to measure my own success as a parent is by looking at myself, not my children. Am I doing the best I can at any given moment? How am I meeting the responsibilities and challenges that Hashem gave me in parenting my children? I don’t want to judge my parenting based on how my children meet or don’t meet other people’s expectations because I don’t believe that we can measure anyone’s true successes or failures by what we see. Each person is given their own unique package of strengths, challenges, assets, and liabilities. A person who appears successful to others may not be someone who has worked to develop the greatest character or who's overcome the most challenges, but simply someone who was given many talents and was blessed with easy successes. On the other hand, someone who appears to others to be unimpressive, may be the person who Hashem views as the greatest success because they are so impressive on the inside. It’s not a question of what a person does, but rather, what have they done with what they were given? In measuring my success as a parent I try my best to give my children the tools, attitudes, and character traits that will help them make the most of what they have been given. I want to raise children who reflect the potential Hashem has given them, whether or not that is obvious to the world.